Change: I saw my doctor last week, I told him, "Doctor, every day I wake up, I look in the mirror, I want to throw up. What's wrong with me?!" He said, "I don't know, but your eyesight is perfect."I went to the psychiatrist, and   View changes from previous version. (Word count: 32)

Change: I saw my doctor last week, I told him, "Doctor, every day I wake up, I look in the mirror, I want to throw up. What's wrong with me?!" He said, "I don't know, but your eyesight is perfect."I went to the psychiatrist, and   View changes from previous version. (Word count: 621)

Change: My wife is Born November 22, 1921, in New York; died October 5, 2004. Dangerfield is best known for the line, "I can't get no respect!"Click EasyEdit to add your favorite Dangerfield jokes. New jokes go on top.I tell you, I got no   View changes from previous version. (Word count: 268)

Change: I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox the cat kept covering me up.It's great to have a gray hair. Ask anyone who's bald.I get no respect at all. My dog keeps barking at   View changes from previous version. (Word count: 242)

Change: I get no respect at all. My dog keeps barking at the front door. He doesn't want to go out. He wants me to leave.I went to a fight the other night and a hockey game broke out. I went to the psychiatrist, and   View changes from previous version. (Word count: 206)

Change: There were only format changes (bold, italics, etc.) in this version. See this version for details. (Word count: 168)

Change: There were only format changes (bold, italics, etc.) in this version. See this version for details. (Word count: 168)

Change: I saw a naked jogger running out of my house. I asked, "Why are you running?" He said, "You came home!"I went to the doctor, and he says, "I got good news; I got bad news. The good news is, they're going to name a disease after you!"asdf   View changes from previous version. (Word count: 151)

Change: There were only format changes (bold, italics, etc.) in this version. See this version for details. (Word count: 151)

Change:  "You came home!"Click EasyEdit to add your favorite Dangerfield jokes.I went to the doctor, and he says, "I got good news; I got bad news. The good news is, they're going to name a disease after you!"Click EasyEdit to add your favorite Dangerfield jokes.   View changes from previous version. (Word count: 151)