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| Version | User | Scope of changes |
|---|---|---|
| Sep 2 2008, 3:50 PM EDT | The-Joker | 29 words added, 51 words deleted |
| Sep 2 2008, 1:07 PM EDT | Blackshuck | 11 words deleted |
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Key: Additions Deletions
Native Americans say that gambling has not affected their culture. I heard that directly from Chief Double Down. (Buzz Nutley)
There are skid marks before the dog.
Native Americans say that gambling has not affected their culture. I heard that directly from Chief Double Down. (Buzz Nutley)
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Two men were sitting next to each other at a bar. After a while, one guy looks at the other and says, "I can't help but think, from listening to you, that you're from Ireland." The other guy responds proudly, 'Yes, that I am!"
The first guy says, "So am I! And where about from Ireland might you be?"
"I'm from Dublin, I am."
"Sure and begora, and so am I! And what street did you live on in Dublin?"
"A lovely little area it was, I lived on McCleary Street in the old central part of town," the second guy says.
"Faith & it's a small world, so did I! And to what school would you have been going?"
"Well now, I went to St. Mary's of course."
The first guy gets really excited, and says, "And so did I. Tell me, what year did you graduate?"
The other guy answers, "Well, now, I graduated in 1964."
"The Good Lord must be smiling down upon us! I can hardly believe our good luck at winding up in the same bar on this very night. Can you believe it, I graduated from St. Mary's in 1964 my own self."
About this time, another guy walks into the bar, sits down, and orders a beer. The bartender walks over shaking his head and mutters, "It's going to be a long night tonight, the Murphy twins are drunk again."
It takes Latinos nine hours to play golf. Four hours for 18 holes and five hours to do the lawn. (George Lopez)
A Mexican, a German, and an American are on a plane. the plane runs out of fuel. the Mexican Jumps out of the Air Plane, the German Jumps out with a Parachutte, and the Amarican walks off the Plane because is is on the ground. (Ed Peterson)
Man 1: Did you hear about the two car crash on Maple Street?
Man 2: No, what happened?
Man 1: 40 mexicans died.
Q: A rich mexican, a poor mexican, Santa, and the easter bunny are each in a corner of a room, and a dollar is in the middle. Who gets it?
A: The poor mexican, the other three don't exist.
How do you kill half the population of mexico?
Throw a penny off a cliff.
How do you kill the other half?
Tell them its still down there.
What's the difference between a pizza and a mexican?
A pizza can feed a family.
a bike doesn't sing old man river when you put a chain on it.
how do you get a black person out of a tree?
cut the rope
One day a man was driving on the highway and he saw a black hitchhiker. He swerved over and hit him. A few miles down the road, he saw another. He swerved over and hit him too. A few more miles and he saw a priest hitchhiking. He figured that he batter give him a ride so he wont go to hell. As he is driving with the priest, he sees another black person on the side of the road. He doesn't want to hit him with the priest in the car. He figures that if he pretnds to fall asleep, he can swerve over and get him. He closes his eyes and starts drifting over. He hears a TINK, CLUNK. He wakes up and asks the priest,"What was that?" The priest says,"you almost missed that nigger, so I opened my door and got him."
The only thing more suspicious than a black man running is a black man tippy-toeing. (Dave Chappelle)
I was born a suspect. I can walk down any street in America and women will clutch their purses tighter, hold onto their mace, lock their car doors. If I look up into the windows of the apartments I pass, I can see old ladies on the phone. They've already dialed 9-1-1 and are just waiting for me to do something wrong. (Chris Rock)
One day a young black boy was standing on the corner with a mouse in his hand. He said to the mouse, "I'm gonna cut your ears off. No, better yet, I'm gonna cut your tail off." Just then a cop puts his hand on the boys shoulder, spins him around and says, "Boy whatever you do to that mouse, I'm gonna do to you." The boy thought about it for a second and said,"Mouse, this is your lucky day. I'm gonna kiss your ass."
God gives a small black boy a pair of wings. "Lord am i an angel?" asks the black boy. God looks down at the black boy and says, "No niga you a bat!!!"
What do the KKK and Nike have in common?
They both make black people run faster.
There's a guy in the grand canyon... he meets a merchant that sells antiques and he sees a rabbit statue. He buys it. He's driving along and he hears a sound from behind him, he looks behind him and sees a rabbit following him. He thinks nothing of it. 10 minutes later he looks back only to see 200 rabbits following him. He thinks, "That's weird..." Another 10 minutes later he looks back and sees another 5000 rabbits. He starts thinking that the rabbits are following the statue. He stops his car, gets out, and throws the statue off of the cliff and into the canyon. He drives back to the merchant and asks, "Do you have a statue of a black person?"
A white guy walks into a bar. The bartender happens to be black and the white guy goes up to him and says, "Hey, nigger, get me a beer!" The black guy says, "Hey, I don't like you calling me names." The white guy says, "Oh, I'm sorry, I'll try to remember that." He comes back and says, "Hey, nigger, get me another beer!!" The bartender says, "I thought I told you not to call me names. How would you like it if we switched places, and I came in here and started calling you names?" The white guy says, "Ok, let's try that out." So they switch places. The bartender come up to the white guy and says, "Hey, honkey!! Get me a beer!!" The white guy says, "I'm sorry, we don't serve niggers."
What do you call Mike Tyson in prison?
-Nigger, nigger, nigger!!!
Jokes about the Brits
Why don't the British make a computer?computer? They haven't figured out how to make it leak oil yet.Indian Jokes
What is the difference between dog road kill and Indian road kill?There are skid marks before the dog.
Native Americans say that gambling has not affected their culture. I heard that directly from Chief Double Down. (Buzz Nutley)
French Jokes
There are so many different reasons to laugh at the French, we had to create a whole page for them: French JokesIrish Jokes
Two Irish guys are fishing. The first guy reels in his line and sees that he's snagged an old bottle. As he's taking it off the hook, a genie pops out and promises to grant him one wish. "Turn the lake into beer," he says. The genie goes, "Poof!" and the lake turns into beer. He says to the other guy, "So what do you think?" The other guy says, "You jerk. Now we've got to piss in the boat." (Unknown)-----------------------------------
Two men were sitting next to each other at a bar. After a while, one guy looks at the other and says, "I can't help but think, from listening to you, that you're from Ireland." The other guy responds proudly, 'Yes, that I am!"
The first guy says, "So am I! And where about from Ireland might you be?"
"I'm from Dublin, I am."
"Sure and begora, and so am I! And what street did you live on in Dublin?"
"A lovely little area it was, I lived on McCleary Street in the old central part of town," the second guy says.
"Faith & it's a small world, so did I! And to what school would you have been going?"
"Well now, I went to St. Mary's of course."
The first guy gets really excited, and says, "And so did I. Tell me, what year did you graduate?"
The other guy answers, "Well, now, I graduated in 1964."
"The Good Lord must be smiling down upon us! I can hardly believe our good luck at winding up in the same bar on this very night. Can you believe it, I graduated from St. Mary's in 1964 my own self."
About this time, another guy walks into the bar, sits down, and orders a beer. The bartender walks over shaking his head and mutters, "It's going to be a long night tonight, the Murphy twins are drunk again."
Latino Jokes
TheresThere's a plane about to crash because of the weight and there are 3 people on the plane, a Mexican, a Whitean person,American, and a French.Frenchman. The French personFrenchman threw out limes, the Mexican threw out just plain old beans, and the White personAmerican threw out the Mexican.It takes Latinos nine hours to play golf. Four hours for 18 holes and five hours to do the lawn. (George Lopez)
A Mexican, a German, and an American are on a plane. the plane runs out of fuel. the Mexican Jumps out of the Air Plane, the German Jumps out with a Parachutte, and the Amarican walks off the Plane because is is on the ground. (Ed Peterson)
Man 1: Did you hear about the two car crash on Maple Street?
Man 2: No, what happened?
Man 1: 40 mexicans died.
Q: A rich mexican, a poor mexican, Santa, and the easter bunny are each in a corner of a room, and a dollar is in the middle. Who gets it?
A: The poor mexican, the other three don't exist.
How do you kill half the population of mexico?
Throw a penny off a cliff.
How do you kill the other half?
Tell them its still down there.
What's the difference between a pizza and a mexican?
A pizza can feed a family.
Black Jokeswhat do you call 1,000 black people at the bottom of the ocean? a good start
What is the difference between a black man and bike?a bike doesn't sing old man river when you put a chain on it.
how do you get a black person out of a tree?
cut the rope
One day a man was driving on the highway and he saw a black hitchhiker. He swerved over and hit him. A few miles down the road, he saw another. He swerved over and hit him too. A few more miles and he saw a priest hitchhiking. He figured that he batter give him a ride so he wont go to hell. As he is driving with the priest, he sees another black person on the side of the road. He doesn't want to hit him with the priest in the car. He figures that if he pretnds to fall asleep, he can swerve over and get him. He closes his eyes and starts drifting over. He hears a TINK, CLUNK. He wakes up and asks the priest,"What was that?" The priest says,"you almost missed that nigger, so I opened my door and got him."
The only thing more suspicious than a black man running is a black man tippy-toeing. (Dave Chappelle)
I was born a suspect. I can walk down any street in America and women will clutch their purses tighter, hold onto their mace, lock their car doors. If I look up into the windows of the apartments I pass, I can see old ladies on the phone. They've already dialed 9-1-1 and are just waiting for me to do something wrong. (Chris Rock)
One day a young black boy was standing on the corner with a mouse in his hand. He said to the mouse, "I'm gonna cut your ears off. No, better yet, I'm gonna cut your tail off." Just then a cop puts his hand on the boys shoulder, spins him around and says, "Boy whatever you do to that mouse, I'm gonna do to you." The boy thought about it for a second and said,"Mouse, this is your lucky day. I'm gonna kiss your ass."
God gives a small black boy a pair of wings. "Lord am i an angel?" asks the black boy. God looks down at the black boy and says, "No niga you a bat!!!"
What do the KKK and Nike have in common?
They both make black people run faster.
There's a guy in the grand canyon... he meets a merchant that sells antiques and he sees a rabbit statue. He buys it. He's driving along and he hears a sound from behind him, he looks behind him and sees a rabbit following him. He thinks nothing of it. 10 minutes later he looks back only to see 200 rabbits following him. He thinks, "That's weird..." Another 10 minutes later he looks back and sees another 5000 rabbits. He starts thinking that the rabbits are following the statue. He stops his car, gets out, and throws the statue off of the cliff and into the canyon. He drives back to the merchant and asks, "Do you have a statue of a black person?"
A white guy walks into a bar. The bartender happens to be black and the white guy goes up to him and says, "Hey, nigger, get me a beer!" The black guy says, "Hey, I don't like you calling me names." The white guy says, "Oh, I'm sorry, I'll try to remember that." He comes back and says, "Hey, nigger, get me another beer!!" The bartender says, "I thought I told you not to call me names. How would you like it if we switched places, and I came in here and started calling you names?" The white guy says, "Ok, let's try that out." So they switch places. The bartender come up to the white guy and says, "Hey, honkey!! Get me a beer!!" The white guy says, "I'm sorry, we don't serve niggers."
What do you call Mike Tyson in prison?
-Nigger, nigger, nigger!!!
