Born October 23, 1925, in Corning, Iowa; died January 23, 2005. Carson hosted The Tonight Show from 1962 until his retirement in 1992. Click EasyEdit to add your favorite Carson observations.

More Johnny Carson Jokes: Carnac the Magnificent

Q: Do you believe in national healthcare?
Carson (as presidential candidate): Yes. The government makes us sick. The least they can do is make us well.

Carson (as presidential candidate): America is the land of opportunity where every young, poor boy can grow up and say, "Hey look, there goes a rich guy."

Last night, it was so cold, the flashers in New York were only describing themselves.

You get the feeling that Dan Quayle's golf bag doesn't have a full set of irons?

Some sad news from Australia... the inventor of the boomerang grenade died today.

Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.

Democracy is buying a big house you can't afford with money you don't have to impress people you wish were dead. And, unlike communism, democracy does not mean having just one ineffective political party; it means having two ineffective political parties. Democracy is welcoming people from other lands, and giving them something to hold onto -- usually a mop or a leaf blower. It means that with proper timing and scrupulous bookkeeping, anyone can die owing the government a huge amount of money. Democracy means free television, not good television, but free. And finally, democracy is the eagle on the back of a dollar bill, with 13 arrows in one claw, 13 leaves on a branch, 13 tail feathers, and 13 stars over its head -- this signifies that when the white man came to this country, it was bad luck for the Indians, bad luck for the trees, bad luck for the wildlife, and lights out for the American eagle.

There is a power struggle going on between President Reagan's advisers. Moe and Curly are out. Larry is still in.

Nancy Reagan fell down and broke her hair.

That would have been a great ticket, Reagan and Ford. An actor and a stuntman.

Did you know Richard Nixon is the only president whose formal portrait was painted by a police sketch artist?