After becoming George Washington he then went to his most present form. Now the present Chuck Norris is the last recorded form so far. Lets go back a bit and look at all the wars Chuck has ben in;

• All of them, on all sides, at the same time

Chuck's last recorded Cr@p, or should I say only recorded crap was the making of the universe. Chuck is now only in the best movies(which is why he isent in any recent ones). When Chuck gose out to eat he all ways pays in exact change. This is the following list of what Chuck likes to eat:

• Whisky
• Rocks

• Whole babys
• cows
• hotdogs
• apple pie
• Coca Cola
• Handfulls of Basil, flower, tomato paste, and cheese.( this may sound like pizza but Chuck gives credit to no body)

Which leads us to present day awsom and the grace of the world that was given to us by our founder and god Chuck Norris.

Chuck can slilence a crying baby by looking at it (there heads explode but as long as the baby isent making any sound its ok).

Chuck Norris wipes himself with the letters of children that were for Santa Clause

Chuck is so awsom he craps dimonds, lightning bolts, or gold bricks. (depending on what he ate the night before)

Chuck is the most patrotic American in the world. When he hears that someone has vandalized American proprety or has betraded America he kills the person who did it, then kills himself and gose to hell, finds that same person, rips his had off, brings himslef back to life, and mounts the head on the wall in his house.

Chuck is so awsom he sells his piss. Its called Red Bull.

The reason Chuck Norris dose not vote is because he'll roundhouse kick any problem the president makes or lets slip by.

They tryed to make a movie called Chuck Norris vs Rockey, the Predator, Alien, King Kong, Godzilla, Jesus, Satan, God, Adam Sandler, Mr. T, the Marvle Superhero team, Ryu from Street Fighter, Super Man, Oz, Tron, Neo, Gandolf, Handcock, Indiana Jones, and the Terminator but the movie was to unrealistic because nothing is a match for Chuck Norris.

Here's a story of boredom. Chuck Norris killed Chuck. E. Cheese and Chucky cause they weren't awesome enough to have his name.

The smell of Chuck Norris' armpit hair could kill a small village of people. (therealdavo)

B...I...N, G, O, and Chuck Norris is his name-o.

chuck norris knows how many roundhouse kicks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop!

chuck norris is the reason bigfoot is hard to find.

chuck norris used to take darth vader's lunch money.