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AThis chronologicalIs listing of some of the greatest and most memorable April Fools Jokes ever perpetrated:1708. British satirist Jonathan Swift (under the pseudonym Isaac Bickerstaff) publishes a prediction of the death of astronomer John Partridge, then releases a pamphlet announcing that the prediction had indeed come true. To his dismay, Partridge finds that everywhere he goes people look at him as if they've seen a ghost.1878. A New York newspaper reports that Thomas Edison has invented a machine that can change dirt into food, and water into wine. Several newspapers reprint the story, praising Edison as a genius.1933. The Madison Capital-Times reports that the Wisconsin state capitol building has collapsed, following a series of explosions attributed to a buildup of "hot gas" following prolonged "verbose debate" in the senate chambers.1934. A joke story published in a German newspaper, showing an aviator taking flight in an ridiculous contraption supposedly powered by the breath in his lungs, is picked up by the Hearst news empire and reported in papers throughout America.1957. The British news program Panorama reports that Swiss farmers are enjoying a bumper spaghetti crop, thanks to a mild winter and effective control measures keeping the spaghetti weevil population in check. The report includes images of Swiss farmers pulling strands of spaghetti from "spaghetti trees," and leads to several calls from viewers asking how they too can grow their own spaghetti.1959. An Indiana newspaper announces that, in order to reduce operational costs, the Kokomo City Police Department would be closed from 6 PM to 6 AM, and each morning an officer would screen the station's answering machine for calls that might still warrant a police response.1962. A technician appears on Sweden's only television station to inform viewers that they can change their black & white reception to color by stretching a nylon stocking across their screen.1965. BBC announces the newest technological advance in television programming: Smellovision. Several viewers actually report being able to smell the aromas coming from their sets.1973. Comedian Spike Milligan, posing as elderly biologist, reveals that he has discovered that exposure to Dutch Elm Disease will render a person immune to the common cold. Unfortunately, he warned that exposure would also cause redheads to lose to hair, as their particular body chemistry made them especially susceptible to the effects of Dutch Elm Disease.1974. A prankster hauls a huge pile of old tires into the crater of Mt. Edgecumbe and sets them on fire, fooling the residents of nearby Sitka, Alaska into thinking the mountain is erupting.1976. A British astronomer announces on BBC that an astronomical event -- Pluto passing behind Jupiter -- would counteract Earth's gravity, and anyone who jumped in the air at precisely that moment would briefly experience a floating sensation.1977. The Guardian publishes a special report on the lovely island nation of San Serriffe, comprised of two islands, Upper Caisse and Lower Caisse — which look exactly like a giant semicolon floating in the ocean.1978. Sydney millionaire Dick Smith tows an "iceberg" all the way from Antarctica into Sydney Harbor, proposing to sell "real Antarctic ice cubes" for 10 cents apiece. Unfortunately, a rain shower quickly reveals that the "iceberg" is in fact shaving cream sprayed over plastic.1979. A London radio network announces "Operation Parallax" -- which would correct Britain's falling "out of sync" with the world calendar by "canceling" the days April 5 and April 12.1980. The BBC reports that Big Ben is scheduled to be "updated" with a new, modern, digital face.1984. An Orlando newspaper runs a story about the newest pet fad -- the Tasmanian Mock Walrus -- resembling a cross between a buck-toothed hamster and a 4-inch walrus, which lives on cockroaches. 1985. Sports Illustrated reports that the Mets have signed rookie pitcher Sidd Finch, who learned to pitch from Tibetan monks and can hurl the ball 168 mph. (The fastest recorded pitch is 103 mph.)1989. Millionaire Richard Branson lands a hot-air balloon specially designed to look like a flying saucer on the outskirts of London. Branson emerges in a silver "spaceman" uniform, frightening the police and citizens that have gathered around his "UFO."1992. NPR announces that Richard Nixon is once again running for President. Comic impressions specialist Rich Little impersonates Nixon giving his speech announcing his candidacy.1993. A radio station in Cologne warns joggers that a new law forbids them to job faster than 6 mph in the city park, lest they disturb the park's squirrels during mating season.1994. PC Computing reports on a bill working its way through Congress making it illegal to web surf while drunk, and also outlawing all sexual content on the Web. In a nice ironic touch, the magazine reports that Senator Edward Kennedy is one of the bill's sponsors.1995. Discover magazine runs a story claiming the wildlife biologists have discovered a new antarctic species -- the "hotheaded naked ice borer" -- that uses its extra-warm head to melt the polar ice and suck down penguins for lunch.1996. Taco Bell announces that they have purchased the Liberty Bell andRisktakers renamedMessin itUp theEverybuddys TacoSites LibertyExtreme Bell.Style WhiteSo House Press Secretary Mike McCurry adds to the joke by announcing that the Lincoln Memorial has also been renamed to the Ford Lincoln Mercury Memorial.1996. Discover magazine announces the discovery of a new subatomic particle of matter -- the bigon. Although difficult to synthesize and existing only for a fraction of second, the bigon is, astonishingly, the size of a bowling ball, and the probable cause of (among other thing) spontaneous human combustion.1997. An email purportedly from the Internet Maintenance Staff at MIT makes the rounds, warning internet users that the internet would be "shut down for cleaning" for 24 hours. Users are advised to disconnect from the internet during the outage, to avoid contamination from internet refuse kicked up by the cleaning.1998. Burger King announces a new menu item: the "left-handed whopper" -- a burger specially designed for southpaws.1998. A New Mexico science newsletter reports that the Alabama state legislature has voted to change the value of pi from 3.14 to the "biblical value" of 3.1999. A Canadian radio station reports that due to Y2K problems, CDs created prior to the year 2000 would no longer work in CD players. Hologram stickers, sold at 2 bucks a pop, could be attached to outmoded CDs to make them Y2K compatible.2004. NPR's All Things Considered airs a story about "portable zip codes" which allow people to keep their zip code when they move, much like phone companies now allow customer to retain their phone numbers.2008. The BBC airs a documentary about a newly discovered flock of flying penguins -- video footage follows their "migration flight "from Antarctica to the Amazon rainforest.2008. Online magazine Grist reports that a nonprofit organization is planningOwner toSucks relocateBalls polarSo bearsYou toBetter AntarcticaWatch toOut saveCuz themIm fromGonna theT effectsBag ofYou globalExtreme warming.Style